Weddings are also hard work, stressful at times & involve a lot of heightened emotions. Not just your own emotions but of those around you.
I absolutely loved planning our wedding, but there were times when trying to find the things I wanted or in less inspired moments just plain anything that wasn't cookie 'this-is-the-kind-of-weddingness-that-every-wedding-should-be' cutter felt ridiculously hard.
I'm thankful for that frustration though, because it led to a lot of late nights & a lot of hard work.
The discovery of so many amazing artists, suppliers & service providers.
And most importantly, to our wedding being so fun, so meaningful, & so us.
I think there's a very fake representation of 'us' within the wedding industry.
It goes a bit like this.
"Here at blah-blah weddings, we're all about making YOUR wedding day all about YOU, making it PERSONAL & THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE!!! That's why we offer you OPTIONS!!!
Now, you can choose from white, ivory, cream, off white OR white with stick on plastic diamonds.
Each option will ONLY cost you your yearly wage, except the bedazzled option which will cost you your home deposit. But you only get married ONCE after all, & you don't want to REGRET anything & it's important you make it all about YOU!!!"
And suddenly even though you don't like any of the options in the slightest, the price tags are making you feel woozy & you're quite worried about the welfare of the hot glue gun equipped child somewhere in the 3rd world... You start feeling defeated. Is this really the choice??? Is this really YOU?
No thank you.
Have the confidence to trust in choices that reflect the truths of who you both are, & not who you are seemingly expected to become for that one day. Your guests - the people you love, will appreciate it. I promise.
I was very relaxed on the day. I think this was surprising for a lot of people that had seen me planning, but that was the point. The more work you put in beforehand, the easier it is to relax when you take your hands of the reins.
I was so incredibly happy with how everything came together - exactly as it had in my head. Which is a beautiful thing to be able to say!
If I were to change anything, there's only really one thing that it would come down to, & that would have been to have a coordinator on the day.
The few things that didn't quite work as well as I had hoped - & this is certainly not anything extreme! - would have all been very easily solved if there had been someone to take care of them. I identified them at the time but I wasn't willing to swap from blissed out to get things done mode, which was definitely a right decision! Little things like Mr N arriving a tiny bit early & seeing that things weren't as they should be & hustling staff to fix it. Not all the guests making it over to the photo booth I had set up - little things, but things that had there been someone there organising it could have all been taken care of in a snap.
I knew even as the preparations for our own nuptials came to an end that the passion that all this researching & planning had stirred in me, wasn't going to have been magically evaporated the morning after.
That the privilege of helping someone else through the process would be momentous.
That to be able to say to someone 'of course they aren't your only options, what do you actually want? I'll take care of it.' would be so rewarding.
To be able to help make that happen so that the time leading up to their wedding, just as much as the day itself, would be as joyous & as fun as it could possibly be.
That during the times when planning a wedding felt lonely (& trust me when i say that if you don't have any of those times you are exceptionally lucky) that I could be there even just to say' you know what? I understand. It's sucky, but it's also totally normal. Want to talk about it? Or centerpieces?'
It is a wonderful thing to have this opportunity to celebrate - in whatever way you choose- your love for one another & your commitment, among those you love & who love you most.
The fact that it should be about you & not an industry shouldn't even need mentioning.
Sometimes it's undeniable that if you put things out there, doors will start to open.
My hallway is looking pretty exciting right now, these are some good lookin' doors!
Feeling very excited.... very blessed...
A huge thank you to the gorgeous people behind those doors, who are inviting me into their lives to be a small part of one of the most special moments imaginable.
I am just so honoured.